The writer calls on family and communities to rally around those affected by budget cuts and disarray in the federal government that is affecting student loans.
By Martin Henson
Beacon Media
The faint smell of chlorine marked my walk, which was preceded by wet footprints and the laughter of children on the other side of a hotel door. We were at a hotel in California in 2016 and I was dropping my 5 year-old daughter off with my cousin, Taylor.
The informal designation of ‘babysitter’ claimed each generation of my family by the time they turned 14, a tradition they endured until they were old enough to go out on their own. Family reunions came with hotel swimming pools, pizza, and a room full of children ready for a good time and an older cousin to watch them when their parents went out at night. I dropped my daughter off in this room, where Taylor would babysit that night, as she did many others.
I always felt good leaving my daughter with Taylor.
The kids also loved what we all loved about her: she fought for her space in the world, spoke her mind, and was charismatic in all the ways we loved and all the ways the world struggles to appreciate in Black women.
Time passed. My daughter grew, and Taylor’s role as a babysitter evolved to mother.
I watched from a distance, proud of her unapologetic assertiveness, concerned that the world would not hold her the way we once had when she was a baby, and the way that she held our children. I followed her journey online and through occasional updates from my mother as she worked her way through school while supporting her growing family. I swelled with pride and wished my grandmother could see her as she went back to school to get her master’s degree while having three young children. She had figured out what to do with all that passion.
So when I read a Facebook post from her earlier this year, her words cut me: “I don’t know how I will continue school without student aid,” she wrote.
The Department of Education is in disarray after massive budget cuts and a promise from President Trump to dismantle the federal agency.
January’s temporary pause on federal student aid was a harbinger of the systemic abandonment of working class students that threatened to sideline her dream and the dream my family has for her, absorbing her into the damage of the Trump administration’s agenda. Government assistance has helped millions of families like mine achieve the American Dream —now it is on the chopping block.
My cousin’s dream and the financial security of her family changed almost overnight. I’m the activist of the family, and even as an older distant cousin, I feel a responsibility to do something to lighten her load.
I imagine there are Taylors in families across the state at our state’s institutions of higher education. People are facing a choice between the life they can afford right now and the one that they planned for themselves.
The shifting landscape will impact access to college, employment, and home ownership, making it difficult for Taylor and others like her to achieve their full potential.
We are not powerless. As the current administration fails to live up to the promise of future generations, it is important that we maintain our connections, and take a more communal approach to the success of those in our community. This means pooling together resources in ways that lessen the load and offer support.
We can communicate legislative updates with vulnerable members of our community. We can keep the children on nights when parents may have to work due to loss of income, rotating schedules with trusted members of community. We must become more communal than our schedule currently allows, to support those enduring the impact of an unexpected shift – just as generations before us have done.
My parents told me stories of how they made a way “out of no way.” Taylor is more than a babysitter now, and I am more than a passive older cousin. We should take this political moment to find new, and old ways of supporting those most directly impacted. Now, my daughter is the family reunion babysitter on the other side of that hotel door, and eventually, Taylor will knock to drop off her children to enjoy the evening.
We are circling around Taylor. Anytime she needs someone to watch the children, an extra meal when she is too tired to cook, and helping her think through cutting her personal expenses so she can navigate higher education.
Many in our community are navigating this crisis, and we can all help shoulder the burden.
Martin Henson lives in Raleigh. He is an advocate and executive director of BMEN foundation, which convenes Black men to address issues in their lives and communities. See his work at MartinHSpeaks.com.